Supporting California Fire Victims: Understanding Grief and Trauma

With the horrific fires in California, I would like to discuss how they impact the victims and how we can help during this tough time. The devastation caused by these fires is not only physical, as countless families have lost their homes and belongings, but it also takes a severe emotional toll on those affected and on the First Responders. Survivors are left to grapple with trauma, anxiety, and uncertainty about their future. It is crucial for us as a community to rally together and offer support. This can be done through various means, such as donating to reliable relief organizations, volunteering our time, or even providing temporary shelter for those displaced. By taking these steps, we can help them rebuild their lives and show that they are not alone in their struggle. Grief is not only about losing someone we love. Grief also happens with a traumatic event like the fires. The victims who lost their homes, pets, and belongings are going through a traumatic experience right now. Their loss goes beyond losing a physical home. The rug has been pulled from under them, leaving them feeling helpless and, in many cases, with nowhere to go. In Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, physiological and safety needs are the top two, followed by love and belonging, esteem, and self-actualization. What happens to our body and mind when we lose a loved one or during a traumatic event such as a natural disaster? It is important to understand what the biological and emotional impacts are; it enables us to render better help. Biological responses: The brain stem (The physical brain) Following a crisis, the brain stem is activated. The sympathetic nervous system sends the body into a fight or flight, freeze, or fawn response. This involves over 120 brain chemicals. In response, parts of the brain are anesthetized. This causes a time warp, tunnel vision, and memory loss. We tend to remember traumatic events like a strobe light rather than a story. (International Grief Institute, icare specialist manual p.4) The limbic system: The emotional brain Second, the hippocampus, amygdala, and thalamus are stimulated. These structures regulate emotions, the storage of memories, and the interpretation of input from the senses. We remember the feelings of an event more vividly rather than the details. (International Grief Institute, icare specialist manual, p.5) The cerebral cortex: The thinking brain. The cerebral cortex is the least active part of the brain during a crisis. Complex thinking like problem-solving and decision-making is somewhat impaired and explains why people become confused. (International Grief Institute, icare specialist manual, P.5) It is also why, during a time of crisis, it is best not to make any important decisions. The next six categories illustrate how grief and trauma affect an individual. There are several factors, and everyone handles trauma and grief differently. But we do share some commonalities. They are as follows: Cognitive, behavioral, emotional, physical, spiritual and social reactions. (International Grief Institute, icare specialist manual, p. 6-8) Cognitive: Forgetfulness, poor concentration, low productivity, negative attitude, confusion, guilt and preoccupation with loss event. Behavioral: 1000-yard stare, hyper startle, sleep disturbance, crying spells, isolation, resentment, increased risk-taking, distrust, withdrawal, impulsiveness Emotional: Anxiety, irritability, mood swings, temper outburst, nightmares, crying spells. Physical: Change in appetite, headaches, fatigue, insomnia, weight change, restlessness, upset stomach. Spiritual: Emptiness, loss of meaning, doubt, unforgiving, loss of direction, cynicism, extreme or sudden religiosity, cessation of practicing of faith. Social: Family strife, altered friendships, changes in workplace, altered social status, role redefinition, loss of motivation, loss of perspective, goal reorientation. What can you do to support fire victims and or someone who lost a loved one? Remember that grief is not a one-size-fits-all. Everyone copes differently. Grief needs not to be fixed but allowed and witnessed: Actively listen to their story without distractions. By talking about a traumatic event, or a loss, the mind start processing what happened. Respect their boundaries; don’t pressure them to talk about the event if they are not ready. Validate their feelings: Acknowledge the trauma, loss, and let them know it is normal to feel overwhelmed and sad. Offer to help gather basic necessities like toiletries, food, clothes, a place to stay. Offer comfort, being present and supportive. It sounds simple, but really, that’s what it is all about. Seek professional help if needed; Medical or psychological. If someone starts talking about suicidal or homicidal ideation, call 911 immediately. Our role is not to be a therapist but to provide support. (International Grief Institute, icare specialist manual, p.13) What matters the most is to let someone know that we are here for them. It is important to offer specific help. This is crucial during the first few days and/or weeks. Mourners and disaster-survivors will most likely be in shock, and are not able to think as clearly as they would under normal circumstances. A few more examples: bring a meal, offer to drive to the grocery store, or help with funeral arrangements. Offer assistance with childcare or picking up kids from school. Suggest going out for a meal or coffee, as a change of scenery can be beneficial. Offer to take a walk together. Remember to breathe with them, yes breathe, as we often breathe shallowly during stressful times, which can increase anxiety. Be clear and specific when offering help. These are only a few suggestions, by keeping it simple, we can be most effective. My heart is heavy for all the fire victims in California. Having lived in CA for 29 years, this is close to my heart. It is truly heartbreaking to witness the shear scale of devastation on the news. We must come together, offering support and understanding to one another during this challenging time. California and the world need compassion and kindness right now. Let’s send our love and caring hearts to our fellow human beings as they navigate through this difficult journey. -Aurora